College is a time when a lot of people like to be single and keep things pretty casual, but that doesn’t mean that every college coed feels that way. There are a lot of college students who are still looking for very solid, serious relationships. If you’re one of those types of people, then you need to know a thing or two about college relationships. They are different from other adult relationships, because you are living in a very charged environment, and that can lead to all kinds of complications for those who are strictly monogamous. Here is how to make your college relationship work.
When you start a relationship with anybody, you should be clear about what you’re looking for, but you also want to keep things relatively low pressure in the beginning so that you can assess what you want from that person in particular. When you find yourself in a place where you know that you want to be in a long-term, committed relationship with that person, you can start disclosing some of your major expectations, caveats, boundaries, and desires. They should be reciprocating by sharing this information as well, so that you can really start to understand one another.
Compartmentalize Your Time
There’s no getting around the fact that relationships are time-consuming. You may be able to study together or be productive in other ways together, but a relationship can really consume all of your free time if you aren’t casual – sometimes even more. That said, taking control of your free time and deciding exactly how much time you can afford to spend on your relationship is very important. It may seem oddly strict, but for some people a college relationship can only work if they only allow themselves to spend time together during the weekends.
Prioritize Your Studies
More than anything, you want to make sure that you are keeping your grades up and not letting your relationship interfere with your studies. It doesn’t matter if you’re studying at University of Cincinnati or Texas State University, if you allow your relationship to interfere with attending your lectures or writing your papers, it is going to become a problem that affects both your eligibility to stay in the college and the harmony of your relationship.
You can’t have any kind of relationship without a strong foundation of trust, but that can be difficult with a college relationship. When you are young and most of your friends are single, it will be easy to feel jealous while witnessing someone else flirt with your partner. As you get a bit older, more of your friends will be married and possibly have kids, and you will probably socialize in far soberer conditions than most college students. If you don’t maintain trust, your relationship in college won’t last very long at all. You have to be trustworthy and you need to behave in a trustworthy way.
Discuss Your Goals
As a couple you should each have clear goals. Some of these goals should pertain to the relationship, and others should be strictly personal. You should both discuss these goals so that you know whether or not you are on the same page when it comes to the future.